no, don't worry, i'm not depressed. yet. it could happen, though, i got depressed a few times during the year after sasha was born. pregnancy didn't help much, but i don't think i had any severe PPD.

but, i was noticing that i haven't been taking many pictures lately. that's mainly because my hands are full or i'm really busy. i miss it though. but i'm not depressed.

yoshi's friend from university, when he went to australia for a year, e-mailed and let him know about a reunion planned for the students who stayed in the international house. being held in thailand. yoshi thinks it would be too difficult (and perhaps unfair) for him to go and leave me here with three children. babies. in march. so, i was ok to go. i've never been to thailand and it's supposed to be lovely and warm. but yoshi already spent his bonus on our new furniture. oops.

yesterday i was almost in tears thinking about immigration. japanese immigration that is. i don't wanna leave and come back to japan. it's ridiculous. finger-printing and photos. and now i've heard it's when you leave and when you come back. what had me almost crying was thinking about my kids seeing me, their mommy, being finger-printed and photographed--like a criminal--just because i'm not japanese. i don't want them to see that. so, if this is the way japan wants to treat me, then i don't want to live here. but how can i leave?

yoshi was unaware of this latest development (that is, how his government can't stand me and doesn't want me or others like me to live in japan). he is bewildered. i am confused and sad and angry, but since i just gave birth i feel like there's nothing i can do about it right now. and i don't want to go to thailand in march.

coarse gold girl wrote and awesome post about this on wednesday. please go read it.