this was recently asked on an e-mail group i belong to. i didn't answer there, because i wasn't sure what i could say. the person who posed the question really seemed to be in a downward trend in culture shock, and i didn't want to make her more upset with my answer.

i've been thinking about it for the past few days, though. my answer, no japan does not feel like home. there are many many reasons why, but i don't think i have the time (or energy) right now to answer them all. one thing, though, is my inability to have japanese girlfriends. why is that?? not that every foreign woman i meet becomes a bosom buddy, but i have quite a few canadian, american, british, kiwi and australian friends, but no japanese. i think it has something to do with me, but there you go. although, this evening we were out while the neighbors were, with their kids, and now the woman around the corner and i have plans to go to costco tomorrow. hm.

one person on the e-mail group said she didn't feel like japan was her home until her daughter was born. but i don't have that same feeling. too often, when i go out with my kids, it's almost like a traveling side-show. i know my kids are gorgeous, but getting so much unwarranted attention is annoying. and divisive. hm.

it's funny, because the other day i was telling a very close friend how i just didn't feel like an adult. here i am, nearing 35 and i feel like i'm playing at grown-up. i don't feel like this is my house, my car, my job (although i do like being a SAHM, it's not forever, and to be honest, spending so much time with my beautiful, but ACTIVE, children is exhausting and i almost want to get a job just to get a break!! lol) and i don't know when i'll feel like i'm there. i used to think i was still a ten-year-old in a older body, but these days i think i'm more like sixteen. not feeling at home at japan probably contributes to me feeling like a child.

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some time ago, chelle asked about wii fit. i am embarrassed to say that i haven't used it much lately. lol the main reason is i just don't have time! it's fun, but i'm not progrssing, since i'm not getting any exercise otherwise, and wii fit seems to be more for training (yoga and simple exercises) than burning fat (although that's what the running and hula hoop is for.) i *have* been getting up earlier, now that yoshi is getting up earlier, so maybe, once my body has adjusted to this new time, i can do some wii training in the morning before the kids wake up.

also, the kids have discovered my neighbor totoro, and we've watched that at least four times a day every day this week! and, if they're awake when i get out the wii, they want me to do the ball balance game, and nothing else!