i didn't mean to complain. it's not that hard. just...i dunno, time consuming. i feel i have no time for myself. i'm with both of them from the time i wake up until i go to sleep. and i feel inadequate because the house doesn't get cleaned, or even unpacked. i guess the hardest part is sasha and her endless need to be held or nursed. i'm tired of that. poor baby.
the weather is turning nice, that's a good thing. cherry trees are blooming and it's warmer at night. soon it will be summer, i am looking forward to that!
April 18, 2024
8 hours ago
6 comments:
I am my own worst enemy when it comes to keeping up with my own expectations. It's OK to take a break from the busyness and find the ways that you're able to enjoy being with your kids. We have four kids now and my husband totally understands that sometimes I will go crazy if I'm not allowed to pull back from the house duties and focus on the kids and myself.
Don't feel bad (or sorry) about how you're feeling. Dwell on it and think about it until you figure out how to get out of it. This skill will come in handy through the years.
I think just seeing the unpacked stuff may be stressing you out. A constant reminder ... Would it be possible to leave both kids with MIL for 1 full-day and then you just focus on packing for that day?
there is no way in H E L L my mil is spending any time alone with my kids. ever. even if we were in the same house or something. NEVER. (sorry, i feel very strongly about that...)
I agree with Sarah's first sentence a lot. Because I have got to be so absolutely completely hard on myself. I'm not hard on other's mind you. But myself? OMG, yesterday! I vacuumed the downstairs, mopped the kitchen floor, windexed the TV and polished the dusty things. Yet the only thing I concentrate on is my cluttered bookshelf. And this morning in fact, I just cleaned my entire upstairs, toilet, bathroom, bath tub, sink, yet again the only thing I concentrate on is both the boys toy boxes that need to be sorted and have yet to get gone, sigh. I think of the stuff, not yet done, instead of feeling relief of the things I *did* do! I need to be a hell of a lot more easier and more forgiving of myself, sigh! I know that and it's something I always struggle with. I am truly.....my own worst enemy!: ( LOL. Seriously though.
I wasn't gonna give suggestions, but let me throw a couple out there and maybe one could help? Okay maybe they won't. I'll just type em' out and we'll see (crossing fingers here).: )
How about the ol' egg timer method thing? I do it once in a while if I have a hard time with getting things done. Buy a timer from the 100 yen. Set it for 20 minutes. And clean your living room for example. And as soon as the bell rings, leave the room. Even if you're not done with it. If you feel like it, head to the next room. Set it for 20 minutes again. And same thing, whether the room gets done or not, leave the room. Sometimes just cleaning 20 minutes per room is enough. It's a start, better then not starting at all. Ha ha ha : )
You could even do the egg timer with the packing if you wanted. For example head to the kitchen unpack all the dishes or whatever, spices and whatever in 20 minutes. Or put all your toiletries and towels into the linen closet. And don't do no more then an hour a day (so like 3 rooms max is more then enough for you, especially since you have 2 young kids). By the end of the week, you should see an improvement. And that way you won't get all pooped out either.
That's all I can think of right now. : )
I fully agree with Sarah. How about planning with Yoshi to take the kids out for a couple of hours and you ( and perhaps a friend)just pump up the music and get one room done. You might have to do this for a few weekends but at least you can just say "screw it all" during the week and just cuddle with your little guy and nurse Sasha with no guilt. I know Yoshi works late BUT you are on the clock 24 flippin hours a day. Maybe he could be in charge of eg. dishes everynight when he gets home.
Admittingly, I have been eating out way too much lately bedcause I discovered if I am not home the house doesn't need to be cleaned tee-hee (no-one to make a mess or if it messy I am not there to see it). I am all for the environment but at this point if Yokohama didn't have such an intense recycling program I would be eating off of disposable dishes. Think hard and talk with your husband about how to make things easier for you- MAKE YOUR NEEDS CLEAR to him because often this is a topic our loving DH's don't think about.
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